At a young age, the topic of love, relationships and future family occupies almost all of our thoughts. Then there are children, and maybe grandchildren, but not always, unfortunately, on a solid foundation of realized family values.
I will not get tired of convincing people that it is never too late to return to the issue of personal happiness, look for love and build relationships with the chosen one. Nevertheless, many " languish over the gold” of their experience, protecting their quiet world with installations that it is already too late at 50.
For your information, according to the WHO classification, 44-60 years is the average age, and not at all “where am I already", " both laughter and sin” or other positions that are incorrect in relation to one's own life.
Yes, there will be peculiarities in comparison with young couples: you are not so savvy in gender communication, you do not understand so clearly what you want from a relationship, you are not so open to sudden changes. But one thing is for sure: you are still worthy of love and you only need to work a little to find this true happiness.
How to build a strong union, being wise with everyday experience, what should you pay attention to, and what should you avoid? Let's consider 8 principles that should be followed in a mature relationship.
Harmony with yourselfOf course, in the search for love, you need to work on your external attractiveness, but it is much more important to be filled with a person internally. It is worth taking time to think, to harmonize goals and desires, to exclude past resentments and disappointments. You need to love and accept yourself, be proud of your achievements, realize your value, because now you are an accomplished person.
Leave your insecurities and fears in the past: you are no longer 19 and the vector of your future is not determined with each date. Think about your priorities, but do not overestimate expectations, and enjoy new acquaintances and nascent close relationships.
Respect for the partnerPeople are not puzzles, and the period of lapping is inevitable. It is very important for an adult couple to take care of each other's feelings and desires. At the slightest inconsistencies, try to instantly assess the importance and steadfastness of your own position, the ability to defend it exclusively in a respectful form.
Be more careful with criticism and more generous with compliments. Even if you decide to argue, do it in the format of negotiations, noting first that the interlocutor has a very interesting position or deep knowledge of the topic.
Do not go to swearing and scandals. Ask yourself the question: if a person stays with his opinion in this area, will it really affect your relationship? For example, you can immediately indicate that you will no longer touch on political topics and start animals if your opinions differ on these issues. After all, even such an innocent confrontation “who is better, cats or dogs” can seriously inflame the situation in a couple.
The uniqueness of the relationshipOf course, memories cannot be erased, and periodically, in certain situations, comparisons with former partners will arise in my head. This cannot be avoided, but you can try to minimize it. It is definitely not necessary to speak about the past-neither in a negative, nor even in a positive way. This will violate the uniqueness of the relations that exist today. Now you are together-enjoy and do not let the ghosts of the past into this oasis.
Personal spaceAn accomplished, mature person certainly needs personal space. This applies to the time allocated for undivided use: to read a book, perform the usual ritual, and even lie in the bathroom for 2 hours. And, of course, personal territory: it is difficult to change ingrained habits, up to the location of furniture and objects in the bedroom, the contents of kitchen drawers or favorite plants on the windowsill.
For a new novel, the place will be freed up gradually - middle-aged people converge with caution, but no less gently and prospectively than before.
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